My Long Unawaited Return

First off, let me apologize to my long list of readers who haven't received their dosage of brain trash in a while. I'll try to be a little more frequent with my posts in the future.

On to the good stuff. This past weekend, I threw a bachelor party for one of my oldest friends. He wanted his underage brothers to be able to hang out with us for at least part of the party so we decided to have a little bbq/pool party. I prepared for the day by making a trip to the Vons down the street where I bought three 30-packs of Tecate (a steal at $10.99 each) and enough burgers, dogs and finger foods to feed a small army, or in this case a ravenous pack of about 10 young gents between the ages of 23-28.

I got to the house around 10:00 am and woke everyone up with a cold one and then went down to the fridge to put the food away where I found a nice surprise... another 40-50 beers in the fridge already. I cleared out the fridge to make room for the essentials and fired up the bbq. Everyone began to roll downstairs via either the stairs or by jumping off the roof into the pool. We grinded through the burgers and dogs in a couple of hours and busted out the beer pong table.

What followed was a mess of beers being poured on people's heads, more roof jumps and a series of atrocities that I will most likely never remember, which is probably a good thing. After we powered through the rest of the beers and got in a power nap and showered, we called up our cabs and went out for the night. I'm not sure how, but we all managed to get to our destination, consume unsafe amounts of alcohol and get back to the pad without incident.

The next morning I woke up and had the pleasure of going to church with my brother who accompanied me in the debauchery the night before. All our mother asked of us was to show up to church on Mother's Day. We figured we owed the woman who brought us into the world at least that much. So after our McDonald's breakfast we rolled into church looking like the living dead and smelling like an old boot filled with whiskey and trout heads. I think we still owe a formal apology to the congregation for the sin that was our foul stench.

At the end of the day I couldn't help feeling pretty good though. I had managed to give my buddy a hell of a party and still make it to church to repent for my sins. :)